Relationships Love Is Blind

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by tablet, Oct 27, 2004.

  1. tablet

    tablet Premium Member

    If we truly love something, whether it's art, science, philosophy, items or a love one. Does it really blinds us? Let's give some example of situation where it blinds us and situation that doesn't and we can compare/contrast.

    Let's discuss!
  2. Bleys

    Bleys Phoenix Takes Flight Staff Member

    The most common form of "love is blind" has to be the parent/child bond relationship.

    You look at a truly reprehensible human like Ted Bundy and the unwaivering love of his mother. There has to be a mistake, he must not be in his right mind, etc.

    We so easily see the faults in others while never finding them in ourselves or our children.
  3. junior_smith

    junior_smith Premium Member

    yeah i have a friend whos dad is into child porn, and we think my frined was abused, but you can never say a bad word about the dad because my friend defends him like crazy, very weird
  4. helenheaven

    helenheaven Premium Member

    Science proves love is blind

    Scientists have shown that there is a degree of truth in the old adage that love is blind.
    They have found that feelings of love lead to a suppression of activity in the areas of the brain controlling critical thought.

    It seems that once we get close to a person, the brain decides the need to assess their character and personality is reduced.

    The study, by University College London, is published in NeuroImage.

    The researchers found that both romantic love and maternal love produce the same effect on the brain.

    They suppress neural activity associated with critical social assessment of other people and negative emotions.

    The UCL team scanned the brains of 20 young mothers while they viewed pictures of their own children, children they were acquainted with, and adult friends.

    The team found that the patterns of brain activity were very similar to those identified in an earlier study looking at the effects of romantic love.


    Both studies recorded increased activity in parts of the brain's "reward system".

    When these areas are stimulated - as they can be by food and drink, or even monetary gain - they produce feelings of euphoria.

    But perhaps more surprisingly, both studies also showed reduced levels of activity in the systems necessary for making negative judgements.

    Similar findings have been found in animal studies.

    Lead researcher Dr Andreas Bartels said it was crucial that both romantic and maternal love were viewed by the brain in a highly positive way - because both were crucial to the perpetuation of the species.

    He said: "Our research enables us to conclude that human attachment employs a push-pull mechanism that overcomes social distance by deactivating networks used for critical social assessment and negative emotions, while it bonds individuals through the involvement of the reward circuitry explaining the power of love to motivate and exhilarate."

    The research did highlight one difference in the brain's response to romantic and maternal love.

    Only romantic love triggered heightened activity in the hypothalamus - which controls feelings of arousal.

    source: BBC News June 2004
  5. tablet

    tablet Premium Member

    Perhaps that's the reason why Love is soo strong because it shutdown other critical part of the brain? I heard they say if you loose one of your sense, all your other sense get stronger. :D
  6. helenheaven

    helenheaven Premium Member

    well, love is not a sense

    but if it shuts down some critical functions of your brain such as responsible thought, thats a scary thought !

    Maybe that explains why so many people cheat on the partners....and why divorce rate is so high ?

    Its true if you lose a sense like sight, your hearing improves as the brain tries to compensate
  7. tablet

    tablet Premium Member

    void, not good example.
  8. Ikebana

    Ikebana Member

    I don't think love blinds us, unless we allow it to. We can still love even though there are flaws that are easily seen. I believe they call it unconditional love. If you have children and you see they have a flaw, you still love them forever. You may see or know the flaws but you don't stop loving them. Children also, see the flaws of their parents, but they still love them. They may see or know their parent's flaws but they still love them. Maybe love is only blind when it involves a lesser bit of maturity in a relationship. For parents and children, there is a continuous 24-7 relationship, so that would be a more long term and solid relationship. In comparison there may be two people who meet and believe they have "fallen" in love, even maybe each having their own ideas of what the other person "should" be like, so they tend to overlook very obvious signs that might be wrong, more of less fooling themselves into believing that the flaws do not exist. Overlooking flaws or pretending they do not exist is not the same as acknowledging them and accepting them.
  9. JcMinJapan

    JcMinJapan Premium Member

    Ikebana... well said!
  10. Ape

    Ape Premium Member

    Well I believe all love is just in the head. You watch day by day people kissing and hugging and laughing you and your brain want that feeling, the feeling you felt when you were being cradeled in your mothers arms or the feeling you got when you were being tickled by your father. It's all pileing up on you. you want the good by don't prepare for the hard work involved in love and the risk your putting yourself in to be hurt or to have that loved one in danger puts you in danger is there any real point to love other than loving that person and enbracing then temporily? Why go through the trouble? That's really why people want anything because people around you have it and you want it. Selfish maby? Does all this seems negative? But......
    .... I believe most people would deem it that , negative. But is it really bad? I mean it feels that way. Saying love is just an effect produced by the brain, true love isn't possible and yo' mama is a set back. Still negative? I dont think so. Isn't survival the only reason any life exist in this universe? So if survival is the only reason anything is here then what does love have anything to do with it? Just to mate? Just to keep our population overpopulating? Too much lovin I'd say.:lol: What seems negative to most people really isn't if you search far enough then you will see the good or opportunity in every situation. Or maby I'm thinking too much? :puz:
  11. tablet

    tablet Premium Member

    JC already give us info on love in a scientific way. The cause and so on. But seriously, it all depend on the person.

    Some people are happy without love and other need love. There are people that try to be in love but it just never work for them, it's like their destiny is to be alone and they feel MORE comfortable being alone.
  12. Ape

    Ape Premium Member

    Is love a setback?
  13. Ape

    Ape Premium Member

    As in, can it be used against you?
  14. JcMinJapan

    JcMinJapan Premium Member

    Love is just a disease..... like any other disease. but, for each person, the disease can be positive or negative. It just depends on the person and their situation. Ok, I know that many will complain that I take love out of love, but I like love... I love love :sing:.
    I see no problem with viewing love as a disease, but I also consider, luck a possible disease as well. Why do we have luck? Is it just a disease that we get for a short amount of time and then it goes away? How about happiness or sadness? Haven`t you just ever felt like crying or laughing for no apparent reason? Well, they do have laughing gas..... The laughing gas is fixed by the defenses of your body, so it wear off... same with your laughing eh? Could everything be a disease and what if you could find it, then harness it?

    To me, that is fascinating...... Should I be :ban:???

  15. _Angel_1991

    _Angel_1991 Premium Member

    Love is not a disease.
    I agree completely with Ikebana.
    Love cannot blind us unless we turn a blind eye.

    When you are blind to the flaws of someone you "love", it is obsession, not love.

    How can you say you love someone when you let them do something stupid or wrong?
  16. poonchang

    poonchang New Member

    I have to ask, do some of you actually know what love feels like? Love is [explicit] powerful! When I was younger, I THOUGHT I had fallen in love several times. It turns out it was merely affection and, in some cases. lust. When you discover love, you WILL know it. I must say that it is not pleasant either. In fact, I would describe it as painful and a form of insanity. Of course, this is just my theory, but it could be one reason why the divorce rate is so high; people simply THINK they love each other. Of course, this theory can be turned on its head: people 'fall in love' but blindly get married not realizing that perhaps it was not a compatible match. I agree that, as difficult as it may be, it is possible to turn a blind eye. However, true love is very strange, and it doesn't just wear off. I don't want to offend anyone, so remember that this is just an opinion and I cannot speak for others' feelings.:love::ch::help::love::help::love:
  17. _Angel_1991

    _Angel_1991 Premium Member

    Love is indeed painful. However, it is accompanied by a great pleasure. Not lust, but .... it is undescribable.

    I have experienced love, but not in the way of I-want-to-spend-my-life-with-this-person kind of love. That kind of usage of the word "love" is the one that comes to mind first. I speak of the love involved in friendship. In true friendship, You are willing to die for your friends. Some may call this kind of love "blind", but I disagree. Just because I am willing to die for some people does not mean that I overlook their flaws. In fact, I am willing to die for them because of those flaws. I hope to let them live so that they can rectify those wrongs.
  18. helenheaven

    helenheaven Premium Member

    The issue hinges on the definition of love.

    If love is a reaction which floods you with masses of chemicals and alters your thought processes, then it is uncontrable per se and therefore hampers your reasoning and "blinds" you.

    If love is the result of a valid decision making process, using discretion and values to evaluate a person's "likeability", then no, it cannot blind you as you are exercising reasoned judgment.

    (*personally I think it is the first option)
  19. tablet

    tablet Premium Member

    can it be used against you?
    Definately! IF something happened to the other person and their heart changed, they can take advantage of you if you're not aware of it. But I doubt that this will happen in true relationship.

    Here's a very interesting perspective on "Love".

  20. _Angel_1991

    _Angel_1991 Premium Member

    Amazing how some people think of Love as a chemical reaction only. If that is the case, then all those people who say "love one another" are promoting something you cannot control, and thus their point is not valid. I beg to differ. In this case, you cannot grow to love someone, you must love them at once since "love" is governed by a chemical reaction. Then what of people who hate each other and then suddenly become friends? How can love be a chemical reaction then? You would have to make a concious decision, and then therefore could not be blind because of love unless you became blind after becoming friends with your enemy.

    That is inconclusive.